Bridge Life

There is a bridge stretching across a vast chasm which depths are unfathomable. The chasm sweeps out in an engulfing and infinite darkness in all directions. The bridge is as long as the chasm is deep, and only as narrow as two men wide. Odd texts and scrollings were carved into the bridge's hard granite. Nobody knows how long it really is, or what lies at the other end; if there even was an end. Only the beginning and shaded accounts remain. It is evident though that some have died en-route, for the people who have turned around on the journey had seen the bodies and bones littering the pathway, the bodies and bones of poor lost souls that were ill prepared for the journey, but of course the bridge and endless chasm gnawed at one's nerves and mind, compelling them to traverse it. Some who travelled it lost their sanity and plunged from the bridge. They could still be free falling, every minute of every day. Fading slowly away from the memory of humanity.

Those who did not take the bridge turned their backs on it completely, forsaking it out of fear of the bridge and chasm's awe inspiring length and depth. Their narrow-mindedness and ignorance were their prime factors for fearing and despising the bridge. They stayed their whole lives until they die on their side, and ironically enough when they do die-- their bodies are then cast into the chasm to fall forever with those who jumped from the bridge. They too disappear from humanity's memory, just as those who fell before them. This is the only time for those who do not take the bridge to experience the chasm they so resented, for the chasm is unavoidable in the bitter end. Those who do not fall in still die on the bridge, only to be remembered by someone else who takes the journey and happen upon the remains. Their entire lives, those who shun the bridge, led up for them to suffer the poetic justice of being devoured by the beast that is the chasm.

I, however, did not fear the bridge nor the chasm; and I have traveled it for many years now, but before I started my trek I did something nobody else had thought of before. Feeling a longing for my regular life and my lust for a new one, I split myself in two, and I left my old self behind while the flighty me began the journey. And though I am miles away from my old self, I still see through my old eyes and move my old self around as easily as I move a limb, and I'm unsure whether this is a master and servant relationship or mutual. Can the old me move the new me as easily as I can move him? I know that since this is the life I've chosen, seeing through the eyes of the old me and moving him doesn't necessarily make me him. And any accomplishments I achieve through him or he achieves on his own have no value to me here. My life there didn't matter, only the bridge did. Though I may never get to the end at least I tried, unlike the other cowardly cretins I left behind.

As the days wore on me-- months even, I desired more of what my other self had, for I was so lonely. Sometimes it was so unbearable; the infinite blackness and the bridge stretching on and on in both directions and the crushing lonliness drove me to the point where I would drop to my knees and stare over the bridge's edge and into a chasm that was beginning to look very tempting. The thought of ending my journey had occured to me more than once, but I could never bring myself to it. I would have to throw myself away from the edge and lie down to contemplate what to do next. Afterwards, I found I felt better after I'd take a break or a nap, or sometimes I'd see through my other self's eyes to take my mind off the bridge. When I felt up to it, I'd hoist myself back up and continue on the bridge, free of any suicidal longings.

Many times it was too much for me and I'd turn back, only I wouldn't get too far before realizing that I was in too deep to turn around. I would then turn around, and continue onwards to the unattainable end in a fruitless endeavor to find enlightenment for myself.

Amazingly enough sometimes I met a fellow traveler either going to the end or returning back to the beginning after abandoning their quest on the bridge. We'd be friends for a short while, but eventually I abandon them or they abandon me. I remember once-- without any given reason-- my companion decided to just jump off the bridge. I didn't care; his loss. All I did was merely stare down at his shrinking body sinking into eternity until the darkness consumed him utterly. My lust for some sort of contact with someone, anyone, made me utterly lonely.

To cure my lonliness I thought of another idea, and that was to split myself again. And so it was done, but in the incarnation of a woman. She was me, and I was her. But even though she was there she was no different than my vessel across the bridge, the other me. I was still alone. Though we walk the bridge together, arm in arm, I will always be utterly alone, but I kept her around.

It was becoming far too straining to keep the two vessels alive and keep enough of me alive so they could live off it also, but my determination to continue onward was the fuel that kept me going. It would be easier if it were only one again, so it often occurs to me to take back one. It would be alright, for they have no soul. They are appendages that are just the spawn of my mind. I made them, and I can just as easily un-make them. But I could never bring myself to destroying them. Instead, I weaken myself further by pushing my abilites to their limits. I could create more me's. And I did. I created a family, though it nearly destroyed me I created even more, pursuing and perfecting my talent. My talent had became a light that chased away the shadows of the chasm, and as the light shone it illuminated a world beside the chasm, hidden by it. A world that could be tread upon, a world created by me. It was my paradise, and I continued to fill it with what I now called Children of the Mind.

I was utterly spent. I spread so much of my soul and mind into them, the only thing keeping me alive was the bridge, and even now it was growing unappealing for I had gone further than anyone else. There was no end, and this was as far as I would get. Sometimes a passerby would be seen walking along a road in my world completely oblivious to their surroundings, being careful not to stray from the path. The world I created was a world only I could see and understand. But once I gathered enough strength to approach them and open my world to them, and they too would abandon the bridge and live in the world that I made.

I have much gratitude that I have the world I created and a vessel in the world of ignorance to monitor those outside the bridge, and I pity them, for they live in a dark stony world where in the bitter end they are thrown to the darkness of the chasm, they themselves never seeing the paradise they could have made also. The years have been many since I began the quest. Old age and utter exhaustion are taking me, and I now barely have the strength to continue, and it was proven when several days ago I fell down and some of the inhabitants and my Children of the Mind found me and took care of me. Within a few days I know the bitter end will come once more. And I am grateful I shared the world I created with others, for if I died and had not instilled my world in other's hearts besides mine, the world and my children would also vanish. Now the travelers and my children have interbred and there is a great population and civilization existing in my world. When I die all my children except for one will vanish:

The other me.

The other me on the other side of the bridge. All my children and original body will die, but he will gain their essence. Though the adventuring me will die, the stay-at-home me will live. He will die there on his side, never to see my world and works again. And he will be cast into the chasm also, like so many others before him he will fall also and his accomplishments will never be known by those who didn't take the bridge.

I am the first to create a world from the darkness. I took despair and overwhelming obstacles and embraced them to make them my own, and I created something out of the bridge. My accomplishments shall forever stand on the bridge as a guiding light to all who take it, and it will be known to them that they too can also achieve a great many things as long as they persevere.We are all going to go to the chasm someday. As long as we walk the bridge, or stay behind, none of our deeds will go unnoticed, even if it is for a very small time.